Many older women with graying hair opt to go blonde instead of dark. Blonde hair tends to blend in better with the grays as they grow in. Dark hair can emphasize the lines on your face, according to stylist Brad Johns in Charla Krupp's book, "How Not to Look Old." If you have gone all gray, consider becoming a blonde rather than a brunette as natural brunette Annette Bening (born May 29, 1958) does here. You'll have to update your roots less often.
While you can do your own hair, I recommend getting your hair colored professionally. You don't want your blonde color to be too light. It's best to have some contrast between your skin and your hair, otherwise you can look washed out.
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Bening is in her 50s. Get inspired by this gallery of Haircuts for Women in Their 50s.